For my sister - the brawns
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| Source: Pinterest |
Darling,
Yesterday you turned 22 but you were too worn out to fully enjoy the celebration. Here's my belated gift:
I turned 22 in 2015. Fresh out of college & feeling cocky about landing my first job. I remember feeling confident that I could take on the world & even slightly entitled. That year I finally accepted that my first relationship was done & dusted hence when, months later, this guy from my office building asked me out, I went for it. This guy was 8 years older than me & brazenly ambitious. Initially, I was attracted to that but it grew old quickly when one, I realized that the car & the dates at high end coffee houses were just for show , two, that I would end up paying for most of these dates since as soon as we sat down he would quickly tell me how low on cash he was & three, that every date was a networking opportunity for him because each time he saw someone he recognized he would leave our table to go talk biashara. Also, he was very loud & it got on my nerves. To top it off, I never once went to his place in the one year we dated because he said he lived with his son after the baby mama left him, please don't judge me.
Next month I will be turning 26 & I still don't fully trust my judgement when it comes to men. However, any trace of entitlement has been wiped off & I have come to accept that I might have to create all the opportunities I dream about. Now I am acutely aware that I am not special in the least but I am unique & that my willingness to wear my heart on my sleeve will break my heart every so often but I refuse to have it any other way. At the same time, I have become less unapologetic (I loved that album by Rihanna) & therefore I have made a series of decisions from a place of fear.
Therefore darling, I hope you learn from my mistakes though some lessons you'll only learn by experiencing them for yourself. Still, I pray that you dare to dream boldly & unapologetically. I pray that you always pray for yourself. I pray that you learn how to be happy even when you're sad because that for me has been my saving grace. Lastly, I pray that you always lean on me because you're kinda stuck with me for life.
Yesterday you turned 22 but you were too worn out to fully enjoy the celebration. Here's my belated gift:
I turned 22 in 2015. Fresh out of college & feeling cocky about landing my first job. I remember feeling confident that I could take on the world & even slightly entitled. That year I finally accepted that my first relationship was done & dusted hence when, months later, this guy from my office building asked me out, I went for it. This guy was 8 years older than me & brazenly ambitious. Initially, I was attracted to that but it grew old quickly when one, I realized that the car & the dates at high end coffee houses were just for show , two, that I would end up paying for most of these dates since as soon as we sat down he would quickly tell me how low on cash he was & three, that every date was a networking opportunity for him because each time he saw someone he recognized he would leave our table to go talk biashara. Also, he was very loud & it got on my nerves. To top it off, I never once went to his place in the one year we dated because he said he lived with his son after the baby mama left him, please don't judge me.
Next month I will be turning 26 & I still don't fully trust my judgement when it comes to men. However, any trace of entitlement has been wiped off & I have come to accept that I might have to create all the opportunities I dream about. Now I am acutely aware that I am not special in the least but I am unique & that my willingness to wear my heart on my sleeve will break my heart every so often but I refuse to have it any other way. At the same time, I have become less unapologetic (I loved that album by Rihanna) & therefore I have made a series of decisions from a place of fear.
Therefore darling, I hope you learn from my mistakes though some lessons you'll only learn by experiencing them for yourself. Still, I pray that you dare to dream boldly & unapologetically. I pray that you always pray for yourself. I pray that you learn how to be happy even when you're sad because that for me has been my saving grace. Lastly, I pray that you always lean on me because you're kinda stuck with me for life.
